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http://www.gruun.org/2013/08/24/私が養子として引き取られた理由/
26歳で結婚する時、新居を借りるため に住民票が必要になり、初めて自分で住民票をとりました。
そこに記載されていた続柄が「養女」。
その時、 初めて自分が親だと思っていた父と母が実の親じゃないことを知り ました。かなりショックでした。
そこに記載されていた続柄が「養女」。
その時、
一方で、納得してほっとしたのも本心です。
というのも、幼い頃から、 親に対して言いようのない違和感を感じていたからです。
私はけして疎外されていた訳でも、 愛されなかった訳でもありません。むしろ、" 自分がこどもを産んだとしても、ここまで愛せるだろうか" と思う位、大事にされていました。
私はけして疎外されていた訳でも、
でも、私は甘えきれなかったし、ワガママを言えなかった。 違和感の原因はこれだったんだ。 事実を知って初めて納得したんです。
実の父は、養子縁組後間も無く亡くなったそうです。 お葬式には連れて行ってもらったようですが、 幼な過ぎて覚えていません。
兄弟も5人いるはずですが、会った事はありません。
養父母は、出来れば死ぬまで事実を隠していたかったそうです。 でも、現実的にはそんなことはできるわけがありません。 私が結婚して間も無く、 実の兄弟から遺産放棄の依頼がきたために、 私に事実を話さざるを得なくなりました。
告知する時の養父母は、本当に辛そうでした。
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→ http://www.gruun.org/2013/08/24/私が養子として引き取られた理由/
When I was about to get married at age of 26, I needed a certificate of residence in order to rent a new home. It was my first time to obtain it by myself. I
found my relation was recorded as "an adopted girl".That was my first time in life to find my parents being not my biological parents. It was a tremendous shock to me.
Simultaneously, to tell you the truth, I was partly relieved from a burden.
Why? because I felt alienated indescribably from them ever since I was very young.
Well, it was nothing to do with any estrangement or I wasn't loved by them. Conversely, I believe I was treasured so much by them, and I would say it was an ultimate level of loving act toward me that no one can ever excced it.
Well, it was nothing to do with any estrangement or I wasn't loved by them. Conversely, I believe I was treasured so much by them, and I would say it was an ultimate level of loving act toward me that no one can ever excced it.
On the contrary, in my mid, I was inhibited for a total surrender to their love and didn't feel pampered. I came to know that's what the
estrangement had been all about, which made me convinced of the fact first time in my life.
I heard my biological father died all too soon after my adoptive-parent/adopted child matching was completed. It seemed that I was taken to his funeral
service, but I don't remember as I was too young then to keep it in my memory.I understand there are 5 brothers, but I never met them.
My adoptive parents say they wanted to hide the fact of me being aadopted-girl up to their dealth, if all at possible. In reality, it's a matter of
course that they can't hide forever. Soon after I got married, the real brothers had to come to my place as they sent me a request of renouncement of succession in advance. There
was no choice left for my adoptive-parents but to tell me the truth. I did feel them going through the deep suffering of this announcement to
me.