特別養子縁組を決意して変わったこと

 

 

(ぐるーんコメント:私たち、出産して初めて巡り会ったわが子を前に「相性」なんて考えたりしない。”私はこの子の親”そう自覚した瞬間から少しずつ”親になってきた”ように思います。)

 

養子縁組をすると決めて準備を始めてから、私の気持ちに変化があったように思う。もちろん、前から「血は繋がらなくても大切な私たち夫婦の子ども」と思ってはいたのだけれど、何かが心の中で変わった。

 

けんたを引き取って、しかるべきところに「養子縁組をしたい」と相談をしてきた。その度に、「慎重に」と言われてきた。養子縁組を前提に進めても、親子の相性があわずにうまくいかなくなるケースが多々あるのだという。だから、「慎重に」して、今までの約5年の歳月が流れたわけだけど、正直なところ、何をどう「慎重に」したらいいのかわからなかった。私たち夫婦は、けんたを子どもとして我が家に迎え入れたい。私たちの気持ちはそれだけなのです。

 

一方で、養子縁組ってどういう意味があるのだろう…とずっと思っていた。手続きは大変なんだけど、それだけで親子のあり方が変わるのかって思っていた。でも実際に決めたら…なんだか、安心した。けんたも同じように見える。

 

私は思う。
血のつながりのある親子だって、それぞれいろいろな事情を抱えながら愛情を持って育てている。私はけんたに障害があったって育てて行く。端から見て相性があわなくたって育てて行く。わが子なんだから。親の年齢や、親子の性格も、人それぞれちがう。違っていていい。それぞれの家族なんだから。

 

もう誰に遠慮する必要もないのだ。特別養子縁組を決めてよかった。「慎重に」なんていう言葉に迷うことなく、もっと早くに縁組みをすれば良かった。私たちの大切なけんた。これから堂々と共に育っていきたい、親子として。

 

 

(When we first see our new born babies face to face after delivery, we never think of "our compatibility" issue.  We simply "become parents" to our new born babies  right after the moment we are firmly determined that  "I am the very parent to this child"....)

 

I think something in mind has chanaged ever since we started the preparation of ourselves deciding to become legitimate/lawful foster parents. Of course, we treated our kid as our precious one to us (us being a couple) even though there is no blood relation between us, but something has certainly changed in our mind.

 

After we took Kenta in to our family,we continued our dialogue with a consulting center that we wish to make our relation as "legitimate foster-parenting match by law" when the time would become right for us. Every time we visit them, we were told " Be discreet"...We were told by them that there are many cases gone up in smoke just because of the compatibility problems even things are pre-proceeded on the ground that the final lawful foster-parent matching would come around the corner sometime in future. That is why we have been so discreet for 5 years up to now. As a matter of fact, we simply couldn't  figure out what has to be "discreet" or how to be "discreet". We, as a couple, are just simple-mindedly welcoming Kenta warmly accommodated into our family home.

 

In the meantime, we have thought quite some time about what the real meanings attached to the special lawful foster-parents match. The procedures are tough, and we thought  the way we bond together on this particular match may have some different meanings. In fact, right after we have decided so, we felt secured of ourselves. Kenta looked the same way.

 

We now think this. There are many different circumstances involved even with parents in  real-blood relation with their children and they are bringing up their children with loving care. I'm determined to bring up Kenta even we may see some impediments in Kenta in future. We are determined to take care of him even with an imcompatibility people may see within us. He is our child. Parents are different in age and character...people are different.  That's naturally different. That's what we are made differently. We are different families one another.

 

We are now free and don't need to feel small to anybody. We were happy to choose the special legitimate foster-parents match. We should have decided much earlier without hesitating by that word  "Be dicreet". Kenta, the treasure of ours. From this time onward, together,we would like to bring up Kenta openly and fearlessly..... we... as the parents and the child.

 「ぐるーんのサポート、いいな。」と思う方、ぐるーんパーソナルスポンサー登録へGO! http://my.formman.com/form/pc/bFkZjtTeYSBPiyQG/ 

 

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1 日本国内への配送に適用されます。その他の国についてはこちらをご参照ください
2 (税込)